![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Emily Dickinson Cosplay
Dec. 3rd, 2020 11:55 amI did absolutely nothing yesterday. Nada, rien, nichts, gornisht.
And did not have a particularly good time doing it.
It’s just so very, very hard to motivate myself to do anything when the weather is so grey and dismal. I feel the pointlessness of it all condensing on my skin like tiny droplets of drizzle.
I am not cut out for a life of Emily Dickinson cosplay.
Today is just as cold but the sun is out, so shortly, I will go tromping.
Exercise is the best remedy for anxiety.
It’s only brain chemistry. It’s only brain chemistry. It’s only brain chemistry.
###
I seem to be walking around in a perpetual state of floating panic.
As for example: I am currently panicking over Ichabod’s job offer since his signature on the dotted line is pending a final HR review and reference check.
I am thinking: But, wait! The California state government has no money! How can they afford to hire a new employee?
I suppose the fact that the position involves healthcare, analysis, administration, and implementation of same, is what will enable them to fill it. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Ichabod finds himself commandeered to work on vaccination logistics.
###
Oh, wait. I did do one thing yesterday: I tutored Nafisa:
It turns out she is going to retake the USMLE on December 12, which is kind of ridiculous because there is no way to do anything with her in less than 10 days that involves real learning. All I can do is go over test-taking strategies with her:
For reading comprehension, only read the first and last paragraphs of the passages they assign. The questions will be keyed to words they underline in the text, and you should be able to answer them on the basis of the information in the sentence that contains that underlined word.
For writing, here are the template phrases that should appear in every answer. Write short, uncomplicated sentences—subject, verb, object: You’ll make fewer mistakes that way.
Is this enough to get her a score that qualifies for a provisional license?
Maybe.
She told me the reason her USMLE reading scores were so low is because she didn’t have enough time to finish the reading comprehension section. My strategy—which should work for around 85% of the questions—will save her time.
It’s just a question of making these strategies part of her automatic responses at a psychic level that’s too deep to be affected by test anxiety.
That can be done, but I’m not at all sure it can be done in the amount of time we have to do it. We are doing one two-hour Zoom session every day between now and December 12, and I am beating her over the head. When she starts making excuses for why she got a particular question wrong, I snap, “Irrelevant! Feeling embarrassed about getting the wrong answer is a type of self-indulgence! You have no time for self-indulgence! Do you see where you made the error? Do you understand what you have to do in order not to repeat the error? Very good! Let’s move on.”
I am a bitch on wheels, in other words.
But it’s the only way to accomplish the goal in so short a period of time.
I so hope Nafisa passes! She is everything you would want a doctor to be—smart as a whip and so empathetic. Her stories of the residencies she did in southern Sudan at clinics that dealt with the aftermath of clitorectomies made me cry.
And did not have a particularly good time doing it.
It’s just so very, very hard to motivate myself to do anything when the weather is so grey and dismal. I feel the pointlessness of it all condensing on my skin like tiny droplets of drizzle.
I am not cut out for a life of Emily Dickinson cosplay.
Today is just as cold but the sun is out, so shortly, I will go tromping.
Exercise is the best remedy for anxiety.
It’s only brain chemistry. It’s only brain chemistry. It’s only brain chemistry.
###
I seem to be walking around in a perpetual state of floating panic.
As for example: I am currently panicking over Ichabod’s job offer since his signature on the dotted line is pending a final HR review and reference check.
I am thinking: But, wait! The California state government has no money! How can they afford to hire a new employee?
I suppose the fact that the position involves healthcare, analysis, administration, and implementation of same, is what will enable them to fill it. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Ichabod finds himself commandeered to work on vaccination logistics.
###
Oh, wait. I did do one thing yesterday: I tutored Nafisa:
It turns out she is going to retake the USMLE on December 12, which is kind of ridiculous because there is no way to do anything with her in less than 10 days that involves real learning. All I can do is go over test-taking strategies with her:
For reading comprehension, only read the first and last paragraphs of the passages they assign. The questions will be keyed to words they underline in the text, and you should be able to answer them on the basis of the information in the sentence that contains that underlined word.
For writing, here are the template phrases that should appear in every answer. Write short, uncomplicated sentences—subject, verb, object: You’ll make fewer mistakes that way.
Is this enough to get her a score that qualifies for a provisional license?
Maybe.
She told me the reason her USMLE reading scores were so low is because she didn’t have enough time to finish the reading comprehension section. My strategy—which should work for around 85% of the questions—will save her time.
It’s just a question of making these strategies part of her automatic responses at a psychic level that’s too deep to be affected by test anxiety.
That can be done, but I’m not at all sure it can be done in the amount of time we have to do it. We are doing one two-hour Zoom session every day between now and December 12, and I am beating her over the head. When she starts making excuses for why she got a particular question wrong, I snap, “Irrelevant! Feeling embarrassed about getting the wrong answer is a type of self-indulgence! You have no time for self-indulgence! Do you see where you made the error? Do you understand what you have to do in order not to repeat the error? Very good! Let’s move on.”
I am a bitch on wheels, in other words.
But it’s the only way to accomplish the goal in so short a period of time.
I so hope Nafisa passes! She is everything you would want a doctor to be—smart as a whip and so empathetic. Her stories of the residencies she did in southern Sudan at clinics that dealt with the aftermath of clitorectomies made me cry.
