That Triumphant Processional Where Liberals Are to be Paraded in Chains Before the Capitol. Naked.

Among the people I sent email out to about the upcoming meeting of the DCPAA was Ed, my neighbor and occasional hiking partner.

Yesterday, while I was out raking leaves, Ed wandered over.

“So! Are you gonna come to the meeting?” I asked.

“I don’t think so,” he said.

“Why?” I asked.

He looked at me. Shrugged. Cleared his throat. “I want you to know I forgive you for voting third party.”

“You forgive me for voting third party,” I repeated.

“I mean, my friend Reed in D.C. – I could just fucking strangle him. But you – you’re just kind of out there –“

“I’m just kind of out there,” I repeated. “Why aren’t you coming to the meeting?”

“I don’t –“ He shook his head.

You’re not coming to the meeting because you’d rather sit around and feel sorry for yourself than take any concrete action, I thought. And you can shove your fuckin’ forgiveness some place tight and moist where the sun don’t shine.

But I said neither of those things.

Instead, I transfixed Ed with an enormous, angelic smile and went back to raking leaves.

He hung around for at least 15 more minutes. It was obvious he wanted me to ask, “Ed. Ed. What’s wrong?” so he could launch into a sobfest about how terrible he feels, how worried he is about the future of his country. 'Cause you know, talking about your feelings is a real change agent.

Earth to Ed: Nothing has fuckin’ happened yet! Except that Trump has backed down on one of his campaign promises and announced that rather than dismantle Obamacare and piss on its smoldering ruins, he intends to – ahem! – adjust it. No doubt angering a sizeable portion of his base not to mention his would-be puppet masters, Pence, Cruz, Ryan, Gingrich et al

Relax, Ed, I want to say. I hear they canceled the triumphant processional in which all liberals were to be paraded in chains in front of the Capitol. Naked.

###

In Facebookland, my beloved son Max posted a long sympathetic screed wondering how he could support all those brave people who were manning the barricades, rioting in cities across the nation.

And before I could stop myself, I wrote: These people, in getting out in the streets, are establishing their liberal bona fides, in a process that has not changed one whit since at least the sixties. They've got time on their hands, the Democratic party lays in smoldering rubble, and there will be competition to see what replaces the toppled Clinton machine - a DLC product the left never truly liked - within that vacuum. They know they're not changing the election results; they're virtue signaling. And, no doubt, getting laid in the process.

Thereby unleashing terribly hurt feelings in Max. And a hysterical meltdown from Mrs. Hare V 2.0, his stepmother, who wrote, HRC was playing by the gentle rules of the game/system that has been played during our country's history until this election!

Oh, really, MaryAnn, I thought. Hillary Clinton is no fucking unicorn. And you should brush up on your American history.

But I went back and deleted my comment. 'Cause you know. I love my kid. And MaryAnn has been incredibly kind to both my kids, Max (her stepson) and Robin, who has been dubbed an honorary Hare.

I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook.
I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook.
I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook.
I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook.
I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook.
I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook.
I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook.
I will not post about anything but cats on Facebook…