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Low Maintenance
Jan. 14th, 2014 08:17 amHokay! I'm no worst for wear after an action-packed weekend that included one birthday party, two movies -- American Hustle (B+); Saving Mr. Banks (C+) -- one serving of Fegato alla Veneziana at a fairly pricey restaurant, a trip to the Poison exhibit at the American Museum of Natural History (eh) and numerous hours on various public transportation venues, which gave me enough time to finish The Poisoner's Handbook just in time to avoid a library fine.
I also did a fair amount of bed-hopping, which I was surprisingly okay about although it's not something I'd want to repeat on a regular basis. A little too much Wait! This is Mister X! Is he the one who likes W-X-Y-Z or Q-R-S-T? It gets too confusing.
Makeup sex with Swain II was entertaining, and he bought me some nice lingerie from Victoria's Secret.
Swain I has a petulant streak, which is fairly annoying and would be a major deal-breaker if I had any inclination to become seriously involved with him, which fortunately, I do not.
"You know, when I was listing all the things I like about you last night, I forgot one thing," he said as he was driving me back to Poughkeepsie Monday morning. "You're low maintenance."
"Low maintenance?" I echoed in disbelief? Really? That's his idea of a compliment?
"That's why I get a little upset when I take you to see plays that aren't very good. I feel a little obligated to make sure you're having a good time."
"Well, that's the contract, isn't it?" I said. "You provide me with entertainment and I provide you with sex."
He raised his eyebrows. "Bluntly put," he said. "But in essence, correct."
Fuck you, I thought. But all I said was, "Define what you mean by 'high maintenance.'"
He ignored the question. "Such a lovely winter morning," he said.
I figured this display of passive aggressive behavior was directly related to the fact that I had ordered him around quite a bit during sex the previous evening. Here's what you're gonna do, I'd told him. And you're gonna get down on your knees and be grateful that I'm allowing you to do it.
He'd really enjoyed it, too.
I think he has a really strong sexual submissive streak, and he's uncomfortable with it. So the next morning, he had to punish me for topping him.
Whatever, dude.
He made me think of George, my Texas millionaire. In my mid-20s, I was involved in two separate menages-a-trois where George was one of the apexes. The first triangle involved me, George and Suzanne; the second involved me, George and Steve.
George was one of my fellow medics at the Berkeley Free Clinic. Suzanne was another. Suzanne was not particularly beautiful or intelligent, but she was one of the most emotionally charismatic human beings I've ever met, so naturally I fell in love with her – at about exactly the same time I fell in love with George, who was not only handsome and intelligent but also rich beyond the wildest dreams of avarice. For about three months, the three of us went around having heated sexual encounters with one another that never involved all three of us together at the same time, which bespoke a certain degree of innocence, I suppose. Suzanne is the person who actually taught me to drive a car!
I was getting increasingly tired of this, though, since I was the low woman on the totem pole in terms of the power dynamic. So one day I cornered George and asked him: What gives? Since I was demonstrably so much more beautiful, intelligent and altogether adorable than Suzanne --
"Well, Patty," said George, "the thing is that Suzanne is really helpless. Whereas it's obvious that you can take care of yourself."
Low maintenance, in other words.
Boom! I fell straight out of love with him. That was easy to do because I was falling in love with Steve.
But when I told George I didn't want to see him anymore a week or so later, he shocked me by breaking down in tears. He'd had a change of heart, he told me. He'd realized that it was really moi he loved with a capital L-U-V!
I should have broken it off anyway but, you know, I was flattered plus this was the Daisy Buchanan I'd been struggling to possess for so long and now I had it! (Three months seems like an eternity to a 20-something girl.)
Anyway, I'm anything but low maintenance, although it's quite true, I had to learn to survive under circumstances that would have destroyed many people, and I'm capable of entertaining myself.
I also did a fair amount of bed-hopping, which I was surprisingly okay about although it's not something I'd want to repeat on a regular basis. A little too much Wait! This is Mister X! Is he the one who likes W-X-Y-Z or Q-R-S-T? It gets too confusing.
Makeup sex with Swain II was entertaining, and he bought me some nice lingerie from Victoria's Secret.
Swain I has a petulant streak, which is fairly annoying and would be a major deal-breaker if I had any inclination to become seriously involved with him, which fortunately, I do not.
"You know, when I was listing all the things I like about you last night, I forgot one thing," he said as he was driving me back to Poughkeepsie Monday morning. "You're low maintenance."
"Low maintenance?" I echoed in disbelief? Really? That's his idea of a compliment?
"That's why I get a little upset when I take you to see plays that aren't very good. I feel a little obligated to make sure you're having a good time."
"Well, that's the contract, isn't it?" I said. "You provide me with entertainment and I provide you with sex."
He raised his eyebrows. "Bluntly put," he said. "But in essence, correct."
Fuck you, I thought. But all I said was, "Define what you mean by 'high maintenance.'"
He ignored the question. "Such a lovely winter morning," he said.
I figured this display of passive aggressive behavior was directly related to the fact that I had ordered him around quite a bit during sex the previous evening. Here's what you're gonna do, I'd told him. And you're gonna get down on your knees and be grateful that I'm allowing you to do it.
He'd really enjoyed it, too.
I think he has a really strong sexual submissive streak, and he's uncomfortable with it. So the next morning, he had to punish me for topping him.
Whatever, dude.
He made me think of George, my Texas millionaire. In my mid-20s, I was involved in two separate menages-a-trois where George was one of the apexes. The first triangle involved me, George and Suzanne; the second involved me, George and Steve.
George was one of my fellow medics at the Berkeley Free Clinic. Suzanne was another. Suzanne was not particularly beautiful or intelligent, but she was one of the most emotionally charismatic human beings I've ever met, so naturally I fell in love with her – at about exactly the same time I fell in love with George, who was not only handsome and intelligent but also rich beyond the wildest dreams of avarice. For about three months, the three of us went around having heated sexual encounters with one another that never involved all three of us together at the same time, which bespoke a certain degree of innocence, I suppose. Suzanne is the person who actually taught me to drive a car!
I was getting increasingly tired of this, though, since I was the low woman on the totem pole in terms of the power dynamic. So one day I cornered George and asked him: What gives? Since I was demonstrably so much more beautiful, intelligent and altogether adorable than Suzanne --
"Well, Patty," said George, "the thing is that Suzanne is really helpless. Whereas it's obvious that you can take care of yourself."
Low maintenance, in other words.
Boom! I fell straight out of love with him. That was easy to do because I was falling in love with Steve.
But when I told George I didn't want to see him anymore a week or so later, he shocked me by breaking down in tears. He'd had a change of heart, he told me. He'd realized that it was really moi he loved with a capital L-U-V!
I should have broken it off anyway but, you know, I was flattered plus this was the Daisy Buchanan I'd been struggling to possess for so long and now I had it! (Three months seems like an eternity to a 20-something girl.)
Anyway, I'm anything but low maintenance, although it's quite true, I had to learn to survive under circumstances that would have destroyed many people, and I'm capable of entertaining myself.
