The Election? It's ALL Fabulous!

[mallorys_camera]

The full nausea of the coming election finally hit yesterday. I spent the day staving off the kinds of acute panic attacks I last remember having back in 2008 when I watched my business die, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. Suck. SUCK. SUCK. Hear that sound? That’s the sound of everything you hold dear going down the drain!

You’ve stepped into a time machine, ladies and germs! It’s 1933, and we’re in the fabulous Weimar Republic! See those wheelbarrows filled with faded Reichmarks? Here, pull up a chair at the fabulous Chestnut Tree Café, grab a glass of warm gin. On a 100-foot LED monitor, the fabulous forces of the Coalition are crushing the ee-vil armies of ISIS! Or are those the ee-vil armies of Eastasia? Which is the one we’ve always been at war with again? I get so-o-o confused! But I know it’s all fabulous!

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(On a completely unrelated note, I was somewhat shocked yesterday to discover that Nineteen Eighty-Four had been written a full 17 years after Brave New World. Nineteen Eighty-Four is the scarier of the two dystopian novels, but I think Brave New World may have been the more accurate. In fact, Brave New World may not even be a dystopian novel. Where’s my soma?)

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Fivethirtyeight is now predicting that Trump has a one in three chance of branding the White House. The Senate races are a dead heat.

My thoughts at this point? HRC will win the Presidency. The Senate and the House will remain in Republican hands.

I’m under no delusion that Democrats = Good and Republicans = Bad. I will say that Democratic platform points are generally more in line with what I’ll implement when the world finally comes to its senses and anoints me Supreme Planetary Leader. But the process in both parties is corrupt, and I’ve never agreed with Machiavelli that ends justify means.

Anyway, I spent yesterday in a complete panicky dither, unable to concentrate on anything. I imagine today will be more of same.